I ventured outside my mini-estate today, when I was overrun by adulating ladies, espousing their dearest initimacies to me. I could not imagine why, until I saw my reflection in the mirror.
Is my resemblance to Colin Firth so striking? And is he really that good looking? I must say, I've enjoyed the attentions, but these women were only tolerable. Not pretty enough to tempt me.
Besides, all my 21st-century affections have been allocated to my lady in pant-suits: Hillary.
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